Saturday, November 12, 2011

Increments

Hello dear readers. Long time no blog, I know! Since it's been so long, instead of a chronological, month-by-month review as is my usual routine, I thought I'd cover a few of the most relevant topics. Things that will get some dedicated MelikaGirl time are: The status of my head injury, Wedding Events/Honeymoon and a celebration post for my dearest Sive who I lost October 22nd. So expect a few posts dedicated to those topics coming up soon!

In this post I'll focus on a brief-ish head injury update. As you may recall, I was felled by a decompensation in April. I recovered a bit late spring, early summer at the time of my last post and from there made incrementally slow improvements.

My return to working a regular schedule was painfully slow. At first it was minimal to no computer time. Then it was computer time until I had symptoms then stopping, moving to a dark quiet place and taking a 10 minute break or resting until symptoms went away again. Eventually I was able to work part days, then full days, seeing 1/3 patient load then slowly and surely a full patient load. I threw my expectations of having a social life out the window. I was medicated and in bed by 9:30 and up at 7 pretty much every day. I kept to my routine and even added nightly mindfulness meditation to my daily ritual, meditating from 30 minutes to 2 hours. I rested my brain at every opportunity. I nurtured my body as well. I start lifting weights and doing some interval training. Once I started working out more regularly my incremental improvements seemed to start increasing by, well, larger increments. By the wedding I could say I felt good most days. I even managed to climb a mountain (photo above from the descent), participate with my marching band in almost every parade as a banner carrier (photo at left) and do things that started to make me feel like I was getting my old life back!

I can't say I'm quite back to normal. Not yet. Screen time, loud sounds and bright and/or flashing lights are still hard to tolerate. But since September I have been successfully playing with Rainbow City Band, often with at least one earplug in, but it's been wonderful to make music again! This fall concert (can you find me at right?) we hosted the annual conference of the Lesbian and Gay Band Association and performed with around 300 other LGBT musicians and performers (the color guard also did an impressive number to a Danny Elfman arrangement). It was a great experience and it was so nice to see some familiar faces from Inauguration and New Orleans!

I still struggle with headaches, neck and jaw pain, some dizziness and difficulty sleeping through the night (usually due to one of the above). Additionally, when I get tired or am not taking proper care of myself, I'll have a hard time concentrating -- this can range from difficulty completing complicated tasks (like charting at the end of the workday) to difficulty with word-finding or expressing myself the way I'd like. These issues predictably seem to come up at the end of a particularly long day with a lot of computer use. It's terribly frustrating as problems staying focused or concentrating are things I've never had to deal with before and are harder for me to manage than the more simple symptoms like pain, dizziness, or nausea. I also sometimes find myself with a shorter fuse, more irritated at little things that used to not bother me nearly as much. But, like I said, if I care of myself, keep stress to a minimum, sleep well, eat well and exercise, these things are manageable and I think that maybe I'll someday be symptom free. *fingers crossed*




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